How Does One Become a Loving Person?

Wednesday, February 17, 2016

Just recently someone asked me this simple yet profound question. I do not know if the conjunction in between two opposite adjectives made sense there. But quite rightly, as I pondered more on the question at hand, I found myself drawn into its depth. 

Can we say that we Love when we feel happy doing something for another person? Or we just do an act regardless if it makes us feel good or not? For me, it is Love when the happiness of the other person becomes essential to your own, like when you feel your own sense of purpose as you do something for your beloved. In such case, an act always comes with Love. Because Love is that force that compels you to act. And for this reason, this act becomes extraordinary because it is done out of Love. Somewhat a circular referencing but I hope you get my point.

But let me qualify the main question here. I believe that Loving is like any person's second nature. It is innate in all of us. Because we are all made to love. To Love is our life's ultimate purpose. (1 John 4:19 "We Love because He first Loved us."A person is naturally inclined to be Loving. So I guess the question should be: 

"How should one Truly Love?"

I attended this teaching and remembered us being asked to replace the word "Love" with the name of your potential partner or as in this post, we will replace this with the word "I". This way, we would know how to Truly Love our Beloved.

1 Corinthians 13:4-7

4 [Love is] I am patient; [love is] I am kind; [love is] I am not envious or boastful or arrogant 5 or rude. [It does] I do not insist on [its] my own way; [it is] I am not irritable or resentful; 6 [it does] I do not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoice[s] in the truth. 7 [It] I bear[s] all things, believe[s] all things, hope[s] all things, endure[s] all things.

And if you find yourself doing these, then, perhaps, you can say that you shall have truly loved. 

Never be afraid to Love! For "Perfect Love casts out Fear." 1 John 4:18 :)

How to Be THE Happy Single

Sunday, February 14, 2016

Happy ValenTYNE's Day, friends! :D

I know, especially for most single friends out there, this day could be as scary as Halloween. Not to mention the unnecessary reminders through Facebook posts or even personal greeting by Facebook itself. Ugh! And you have never felt so single.. Ever! Just too much to take, isn't it? LOL.

But hey, it isn't too bad being single on Vday! In fact, it could be a day too for celebrating the other types of Love. If you must know  (or be reminded), Love comes in different shapes and forms. And there is what we call as "SELF LOVE", which is the focus of this post.

I am personally a proponent of "Self Love" because I believe that you cannot give away something that you do not have for yourself. I have been single for almost 6 years now. And throughout all those years, the best thing that ever happened to me is me giving myself the Love it deserves.

Being Single can sometimes be challenging especially in a society where there seems to be a stigma (for lack of a better word) for people who are single. Of course, in the natural order of things, life can be sweeter when shared with someone special. Yet, there are some of us who are just happy as we are as single, either by choice or by circumstances. 

I have asked some insightful tips from my brilliant friends on "How to be the Happy Single". Let's read through what they have to say:

"Do not constantly obsess about finding the "one". Aim to find friendship instead, especially when meeting men. Try not to fantasize your golden wedding anniversary on the first date. Save that for the 10th. " - Trisha | Accountant | Adventurous | Recklessly venturing her way to Love | Blogger: autumnennui

"There are no hard and fast rules on how to be happy while waiting for love to come. You should just keep in mind that you don't need another person to feel complete and happy. So focus on that thought, and do the things you want to do. I found that pampering myself and putting myself first helped me to feel happy and content. Fill your love tank on your own so that when the right person comes, you will have so much love to give and share. :)" - Mel | Passionate Soul | Intense Lover | Happily Taken | Blogger: faithloveme

"Remember that there are different kinds of love. Even if you're single, it doesn't mean you're not loved. 

The thing about being human is that we tend to fixate on the one thing we don't have and forget everything else that we do. 

So look around you and appreciate your family and friends. Enjoy their company and relish what they have to offer. 

Because just think, what if a genie arrived and told you he could give you your soulmate but you had to give up everyone else in your life, do you think it would make you happy? "  - Dee | Mother Brain | Life of the Party | Happily Single | Blogger: adeecodedlife

"Be the reason for people around you to smile" - Carr | Beauty, Brain & Heart | Traveller | Starbucks Sweetheart | Food Blogger: carriefooddiaries

"Stay happy. Period." - Bell | Fashionista  Blessed | Loved | Grateful | Blogger: belltecson

" Being single is the ideal situation to spoil yourself, pursue your goals, indulge in your hobbies, and explore your environment. Try new stuff, take that cooking class, art class, or yoga class that you've been wanting to do -  you will also expand your social circle with other like-minded individuals. Relax, enjoy the single life, and the opportunities that come with it" - Kathleen | Nurse | Promising Student | Blogger: keiz08

"My advice is, while that person hasn't arrived yet, focus on yourself and the people around you, your family and friends, don't waste time thinking about having no special someone yet. Just think that God has a better plan for you. Enjoy every single moment being with your loved ones. Don't allow yourself to get pressured with what the society dictates. You are special. You have your own timeline" - Jack | Bankable Bachelor (Works for BSP) | Spoiler Boyfriend | Currently Waiting for the One

"1. Constantly improve yourself. Join a sports club, a dance class, a cooking lesson. You'd be surprise there's much to learn.

2. Surround yourself with friends. There's always joy in spending time with them. They are the next best thing to your family.

3. Do not search for the one. It will come at the right time." - Cate | Accountant | Badminton Champion | Thoughtful & Sweet Lover

"There are times when you want a less-drama-kind-of-life and at some point you can get that if you're around with your guy friends. So if you're still single & still waiting, you can hang around with them as often as you want. And who knows maybe one of them will be 'the one.' " - Meggy | Servant Leader | Enjoying with Friends | Waiting in Grace

"Don’t see being single as being alone because choosing to be single is better than being with the wrong person. You are in a long-term relationship with yourself, improving as a person and working towards your goals and when the time is right, you may find that someone who deserves your awesome self." - Raffy | Banker| No Girlfriend Since Birth | Blogger: cafeforthecurious

So I guess the real deal is to learn to Love yourself as a single person first. No one else can satisfy the yearnings of your soul better than you. Do what makes you happy. And when you feel happy about yourself, it just reflects on the outside. Who knows, as they say, Happiness can be an irresistible attraction. ;)

Enjoy the best times of your life, my dears! :D